In my novel, Portsmouth A Love Story, I wrote a scene where the main character, Severine Champagne asks God why she isn’t with the husband she longed for all her life. It’s a question many women and men have asked themselves if they’ve reached their 40’s and the right partner is not a part of their life yet. As she walks on the beach, she hears the words Forgive the Past. She thought she had forgiven and released the past. The reality was she wasn’t with a loving partner, something she truly wanted, which meant her desire was blocked. But why? Fears or old wounds still lingered in her soul. I think that’s true of many things in our life that seem blocked. A Course in Miracles says that any time there is dis-ease there is an unforgiveness. Pain about not being with a partner or the right partner is evidence that there is dis-ease and a need to uncover an unforgiveness.
Enjoy this Excerpt from PORTSMOUTH, A LOVE STORY
She hadn’t spoken to her mother for many years. As a young woman, she had made several attempts to draw a line in the sand as to the level of negative energy she would take from her before she would finally leave the relationship. After many attempts, she had to admit that the woman was completely unconscious. To stay and continue interacting with her would be submitting herself to an emotionally dangerous environment. Her mother knew her weak points and most of all, how to extract guilt.
What she had learned after studying about spirituality was that manipulation and control is not love. There was no obligation to stay in a family that was harmful to her spirit.
Severine thought she had successfully let go of her toxic past but now it was coming back to haunt her. She was told there was still a lingering unforgiveness blocking her path.
I have no interest in opening that old can of worms again. I can’t see how that would do any good. I can’t change her. I just need to INTEND to forgive her. Not that I believe my mother was right about anything. That’s for sure. I’m doing it for ME…and my future.
At sunset, to mark the occasion, she returned to Wallis Sands and headed over to the point where Stinky Creek emptied into the Atlantic. She took a rock from the beach and said out loud, I forgive and release my mother to God.
In a split second, she decided to pick up another rock. She threw the rock into the water and watched it sink to the bottom and said, I forgive and release Peter Nicholas to God.
With sincere intention to surrender all past anger and any lurking unforgiveness, the rooms of her Spirit were swept clean. She was now ready to embrace a new family, whoever that might be.
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